My partner and I have been together for ten years. During that time he has learned to not only accept but happily enjoy and participate in my fetish for male dancers. We have traveled across the United States and visited many different bars and clubs. When in Atlanta, we go to Swinging Richards; if in Springfield, MA we go to xStatic; or if in mid-america near St. Louis, we stop in at Boxers N Briefs. These are all clubs with nude male dancers but we also visit clubs with go-go boys, or male revues. At each of these events where tipping is the norm, we play a game. Before we enter a bar or club we determine an amount in tips that we will give to the dancers. When that amount is gone, it is gone. Now, we are not rich, nor are we poor. The tip amounts range from $50 to several hundred dollars. But just because we have set aside that amount for the dancers, doesn't mean that they will receive it.
I strongly believe in good old-fashioned customer service. Now, that doesn't mean that I'm expecting a little "something extra" from the dancer. What it means is this. When a dancer that I find attractive is performing his session on stage or at the pole, etc., I will go up and tip him. If he says "thank you", then I will return during his next session and tip him again. If he doesn't say "thank you", then I write him off for the rest of the evening. Unless...after he finishes dancing he comes by my table and tells me thank you. Then, I will tip him again while at my table and then be sure to tip again during his next session. For the clubs that have lap dances and VIP rooms, this also helps to determine whether I will spend more money in those areas as well.
Why do I do this? Because, unlike the stereotypical idea of the male strip club bar patron, I am not desperate, not an old troll, perv, or wannabe. I am simply a person who enjoys having a drink from time-to-time and while I'm having that drink I like watching good-looking men run around in their underwear or less. It's a performance, a show, and I like the content of the show. There are some dancers, usually the younger guys, who often get an over-inflated sense of how important they are in the scheme of things. Now, I don't blame them really. If you had people telling you night after night how "hot" and desirable you are, it could go to your head. But, I like dancers who know the "game". The game of give-and-take. He gives me a little attention, and I help pay his way through college one tip at a time. That's the game.
Why is this important to a male dancer? First, a customer wants to be noticed. Often times they come into a bar or club alone. It is the dancer's job to make sure that this person does not become the invisible man (or woman). If the customer feels like someone actually notices and cares that he is there, they are more than likely to return for a repeat visit. A repeat visit, means the potential for repeat tips for the dancer. This will help the dancer to build up a regular customer base that keeps him and the bar going. Now getting some attention is always good, but getting attention from a hot male dancer, well, that just makes it sweeter. Patrons who go to bars and clubs with male dancers are also there because they are fans. And like fans of any sport or event, when they are enjoying their experience, they tend to loosen the hold on their money. This provides the potential for more dollars to be given in the exchange I described previously. If the dancer says "thank you" when tipped, then he acknowledges that the customer exists, and has done something positive in his behalf, and is grateful. If this is followed up by a visit to the table to once again say "thanks", the dancer is almost guaranteed to receive additional tips from this customer and the customer will look for the dancer on their next visit to the club. The potential for future income has been created.
My partner and I have been in clubs where not one dancer came up and talked to us even though they were walking around and talking to others. In those situations, we finish our drinks and leave. And of course, write a few online reviews. At the same time, to those clubs such as Hunters, in Elk Grove Village, IL (Chicago area) where you start to feel like a regular soon after you sit down, we applaud them, give away all our tip money, and write a few positive online reviews as well.
To the dancer we recommend "ALWAYS say thank you when a fan tips you". If you are so inclined a "thank you baby" will work wonders. Tell me about some of your experiences send me an email or post a comment.