Promoting Your Pretty Self Online Tips For Exotic Male Dancers

(Photo Source: Share Nightclub ~ Las Vegas, NV)

As a photographer and promoter, I have made many mistakes in my career but hopefully they have served to improve my talent and ability to promote my clients. I try to learn from all the mistakes and improve each time. With eleven years experience in promoting exotic male dancers (and a few drag queens here and there), I feel I have a few tips and suggestions that might help others. I've put together eight in this blog that I feel are worth thinking about. (NOTE: The pics in this blog are some I have used to show samples of pics that I often share in social media. If I and others share, that equals more promotion.)

(Photo Source: C. Marcelo for BJsNXs ~ Dallas, TX)

ONE: ALWAYS HAVE TWO SOCIAL MEDIA ACCOUNTS    If you're going to bitch, moan and complain on Facebook and other online social media outlets, then create two accounts. The first one will be your business account. Everything you post here should be positive. Only post the pics and videos where you look your best. You are promoting the product, you, and your potential employers want to see the best you that will help to represent their product or service. The friends you add to your circle on this account should be fans and business connections.

The second account is for you personally. Add your close friends and pour your soul out on it if you want, use it for therapy, vent, etc. But always keep the two separate. I have deleted male dancers from my friends list who spend most of their time, whining, crying and bitching. I don't want to read it, and I don't want to help promote them. There is enough negative in this world without my assisting in spreading it around.

(Photo Source: The Corner Pocket ~ New Orleans, LA)

TWO: DON'T CONFRONT THE HATERS, REMOVE THEM    There is no rule that says you have to keep a hater on your friends list. They will sap your energy and turn your focus from moving forward to trying to defend yourself. Remove them! You don't need them. If you acknowledge them, you are giving them power. You aren't losing a fan and you're keeping your career focused in the direction you are wanting it to go. I get them from time to time. I simply remove and block them and move on.

(Photo Source: Icon ~ Astoria, Queens, NY)

THREE: DO NOT POST WHEN YOU ARE PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY OR EMOTIONALLY IMPAIRED    So, you had a few drinks at the bar...no problem, hope you had fun! But avoid posting on social media on your business account. You aren't feeling well. I hope you get to feeling better. But avoid posting on social media on your business account. You spent some time with friends and maybe involved yourself in a few recreational chemical experiences....I don't judge, be careful. But avoid posting on social media on your business account. Ok, hear this...you had a death in the family. I am truly sorry to hear this if it has happened to you. But avoid posting on social media on your business account. When you are physically, emotionally or mentally impaired, you tend to remove your filters and post things that do not promote you in a positive light. You may think me harsh, but I do not want to read about a death in your family when I am looking for a dancer for my club or event. I will think you are not emotionally up for the task of representing my interests. And if you are drunk or high, I am going to see you as trouble, and not someone I want to be paying to perform at my place of business.

(Photo Source: Chris Boucher ~ Los Angeles, CA)

FOUR: TAKE PICS WITH FANS/CUSTOMERS    The fans/customers are the folks with the tip money. You always want to appear friendly and open. By taking pics with other fans and customers, you promote the image that you are approachable. If you want to be a diva, go ahead, but I won't tip you and others will find someone else more friendly. I don't mean to burst your bubble, but there are literally hundreds of good looking, well built guys that are dancing in clubs and venues across North America. We'll be able to find one to replace you. On the other hand, if you have all of that, and are customer friendly, I'll be coming back for more, and if you wear a cowboy hat...

(Photo Source: Greyson Layne ~ Raleigh, NC)

FIVE: AVOID SHARING TOO MUCH ABOUT YOUR PERSONAL LIFE    An exotic male dancer performs a service as part of a fantasy for customers and fans. Let them have their fantasies. It will result in better tips. Avoid shattering the fantasies by sharing too much of your personal life on your social media business account. Positive things to share are your work-out routines, diet, new underwear purchases (or costumes), dates and places you'll be performing, etc. Use your discretion. If you think it will help promote you, post it. Also, we hope it doesn't happen but in the case of a potential stalker, you don't want to give them too much personal information.

(Photo Source: Jason King for Here Lounge ~ West Hollywood, CA)

SIX: POST THE RIGHT PICS - CROPPED THE RIGHT WAY    Let's cut to the chase...if you want to be promoted online, post a pic that will be shared. Unless you have the most amazing face, arms, chest or abs, I'm most likely not going to share or repost your pic if you crop it at the waist. I want to see you in underwear that either presents your bulge or highlights your ass! As a fan I get a feeling of disappointment when I see a hot male dancer in a pic and nothing below the waist is shown. I understand that there are those times when posting that pic might get it reported, at least on Facebook. But when possible, I want to see 'the boys' and I want to see the ass. And if I don't, I'll probably keep scrolling and not give you that extra promotion by sharing your pic.

Advertisement

(Photo Source: Athletic Star)

SEVEN: AVOID USING THE HIGH SCHOOL CLUB PICS FOR PROMOTION    I'm willing to admit that this is a personal pet peeve. By High School Club Pics, I am talking about the group pics where everyone is standing shoulder-to-shoulder. These pics remind me of when pics of clubs and organizations were taken for the high school yearbook. The problem with this type of pose is you place yourself in one of those "Which one is the hottest positions?" You see those pics posted on Facebook a lot where the question is asked, which would you rather sleep with? 1, 2 or 3? It's not a bad position to be in if you are the one being chosen each time. That is great promotion. But, if you are not going to be the one chosen, then you will decrease your promotional value. The fan/customer/potential employer would evaluate each dancer in the pic. They could determine that they like you, but they really wish they could have the one to your right, etc. When by yourself in a pic, there are no other dancers beside you for comparison. From an eye candy perspective, I like group pics of hot guys but for the individual male dancer, this type of pic is not always in your best promotional interest.

(Photo Source: Athletic Star)

EIGHT: ALWAYS ANSWER AND REPLY    If you are going to ignore me, then I am going to ignore you. I do not respect a person who chooses not to reply to a message I have sent them. If I send you an email, message you on social media, call you on the phone, leave a voice mail, send you a snail mail letter...and there is some component or question in the message that asks for a reply, please be courteous enough to reply. When you choose not to reply, you are telling me that I am unimportant and it's ok to ignore me. Hey, this is most likely the case. I am not going to be important in the lives of most people. However, you are running a business. I am a potential customer. And in this case, I am a resource of promotion for your business, service, product, entertainment, etc. When someone ignores me once, I can rationalize that maybe they missed the message because it didn't make it to their inbox, or maybe they had so many messages, that it was overlooked, etc. I'll allow that once, but if I resend and I'm still ignored and I know I've sent it to the right place, then I am going to delete that person from my business activities.

I am using myself as the example here, but put the name of any person in your friends list in my place. What type of message are you sending by ignoring them? What potential door of opportunity are you closing by not sending a reply? Even if you aren't going to be able to do what they are asking, they will respect a response that says, "thank you for asking, but unfortunately at this time, I am unable to ...". Of course, always end that response with, please contact me in the future should a similar opportunity arise.

(Photo Source: Jake at Oil Can Harry's ~ Austin, TX)

I hope all exotic male dancers realize that I write these blogs because I want them to be successful. I share tips and suggestions because I want the dancing men to continue dancing. I want to continue to enjoy my favorite form of entertainment. Until next time, promote your pretty self, post those pics, and I'll be sure and share them...as long as they show below the waist. And for you fans who have read this...don't forget to tip the boyz!!!

UPDATE: May 2017: Political Posts    There is currently a super charged political environment in the United States. I recommend that you make no political posts on your business social media accounts. Although most of the people in your entertainment circle will most likely agree with your political positions, there are some who will not. Do not close any doors before you are given an opportunity to walk through them. And as is the very real and frequent response these days, you may say "Fuck You! I hate those $%$#*&@# people!" That's ok by me, I'm just looking out for your best business related interests. However, if you have a personal account, then I say post whatever the hell you want, and as often as you want. Just remember, you never know the exact political convictions of the gate keepers. And not all of them are of one viewpoint or another. Some of them are a mix depending on the issue.