Exposing The Male Dancer Guidelines For Social Media Promotion Part One: Make Two Separate Accounts

Photo Source: Michael Hill Digital

Lately I've seen a few missteps in male dancers promoting themselves on social media. It hasn't been anything world shattering, but maybe I can help to steer the sexy boys in a better direction for a more successful outcome. With this blog I start a series for Exposing The Male Dancer. We're talking about the right kind of exposure, or promotion. I'll discuss promotion tips and post several exposing photos. Let me know if you agree with this blog in a comment below, or a Facebook message or an email. Please pass this blog on to every exotic male dancer you know. I feel it is important enough for all to read!

Why do I think I can help? This September will mark 13 years that I have been in the promotion and entertainment photography business. I spend a minimum of two hours every day reading and posting to social media for the purpose of promoting male dancers, clubs and events that feature them, photographers that feature them, underwear and costumes that look great on them, and much more. I assist male dancers in obtaining gigs, consult with bar owners and managers, hire male dancers for events, and have developed great business relationships and friendships along the way. I am therefore qualified to write this blog giving a few pointers to exotic male dancers about promoting themselves in social media.

Photo Source: Michael Hill Digital

For every social media that a male dancer desires to be active in, two separate accounts should be created and maintained. Always keep them separate, both in posts and in friends you add. The two accounts are for the purpose of keeping the professional and the personal separated. Why? I'm glad you asked. First, I'll list below the things that as a customer/fan, I should NOT see and read. Then second, I'll list the items that I should see and read. For the customers/fans that are reading this blog, I have some suggestions for you as well, at the end.

A Fan/Customer SHOULD NOT see and read the following: The customer/fan should not read about your emotional roller coaster as you post your daily, weekly or monthly feelings. A customer/fan should not observe your pity party because your roommate, family, or friend butt hurt you and did blah, blah, blah. Your personal relationships are none of the customer/fan's business. A customer/fan should not have to read about your personal drama. A customer/fan should never know when another stripper, club management, show director, drag queen, a customer, etc., has pissed you off. You may think it is soulless, but a customer/fan should not know when you need prayer or good thoughts sent your way. The customer/fan is not your therapist, your priest, your gofundme source, etc. The above should give you an idea of what should not be in your professional social media account.

A Fan/Customer SHOULD see or read the following: Sexy photos of you to promote your male stripper gigs and opportunities. I of course, recommend professional photos by a photographer with a great reputation and good eye. Sexy photos of you performing at clubs and events. Video clips of you performing at clubs and events. Live broadcast of you performing at clubs and events. Dates and locations for your personal appearances. Informing club managers/show directors that you are available for gigs. Upcoming events such as a special club appearance, photo shoot, or other job related activity. Teaser posts - such as "I will be wearing the new underwear I bought at tonight's show. Come check it out." Promote other dancers, entertainers, bartenders, DJs, etc., but not too heavily. Keep it mostly about you. Requests for rides, assistance in making costumes, where to buy great underwear, etc., are all acceptable as well. Keep these posts related to your occupation as an exotic male dancer. Add only friends that are associated with the business. There may be some overlap with your personal account but keep it to a minimum.

The Personal Account Add only close friends and family. There may be some overlap with business account but keep it to a minimum. Post whatever the hell you want.

Photo Source: Michael Hill Digital

Why are two separate social media accounts important? As an exotic male dancer, you are playing a roll in a fantasy for the customer/fan. When that fantasy is maintained, they will come to the club or event where you are performing with it in their mind. You want to help them to maintain this fantasy. They want to be entertained. They are also coming to a club or event to escape real life for a few hours. Your personal life is not a part of the fantasy, and is often a turn off to any potential new customer and to many existing customers. They don't want to read about your problem with relationships, roommates, finances, etc. They have enough of that of their own. Please don't drag them in to your drama. This is solid advice for your online promotion and when performing at a club or event where you speak with them face-to-face.

Also, many male dancers will add their employers as friends on their social media accounts. So, any drama that goes on with you is known by your employer. Your employer only needs to know that you are at work when scheduled and on time, and that you are performing at your best while there.

Photo Source: Michael Hill Digital

To the customer/fan I give a gentle warning. I love the pretty dancing boys as much as anyone. Although there are many who are professional and ethical in their dealings with others, there are some of them who are not so pretty inside. The game that goes on between male strippers and the customer is total manipulation, where both are seeking something. It is fair because it is an exchange. The customer/fan wants entertainment from a hot, sexy male dancer. The male dancer is trying to pay his bills, buy something new or save for some future goal.

But some male dancers take the game beyond where it should go. They are masters at manipulation and will try to work you for some type of gain, usually money through dishonesty, etc. I have seen posts from male dancers who posts using the poverty card and talk about how poor they are in an attempt to have someone feel sorry for them and help out. And yet, a few paragraphs previous they were talking about how drunk they got going out with friends. Ok, so maybe the friends bought the drinks, but if they are so down on their luck, shouldn't they ask the friend to help them with food, bills, or other expenses instead? And be careful of those who use the Wimpy, from Popeye, approach. Wimpy always said, "I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today." But Tuesday never comes. I called this a gentle warning because, hey, after all, it is your money, and you can choose to spend it however you like.

Photo Source: Michael Hill Digital

To the male dancer I also give a gentle warning. It is much safer and wiser to keep your personal information locked safely away. Two separate accounts can help do this. There are customers/fans who may become obsessive and could possibly be a bit unstable. You do not want these people to have your personal information. They do not need to know where you live or who your close friends are. If you work at a second job, they do not need to know where that job is located. You do not want some of these people showing up at your place of work. Some customers/fans can become infatuated with a dancer and be completely annoying or even to the point of becoming a stalker. Now, I know there aren't a lot of this type around but it is always better to be safe, particularly when there is no real reason to share your personal information with everyone.

When two accounts are created in social media, there are fewer opportunities for abuse by either the customer/fan or the male dancer. Until next time, dancers, strippers, go-go's, etc., create that second social media account. And as always, customers and fans, don't forget to tip the boys!

Click here and read Part Two: Five Photo Tips For Exotic Male Dancers!

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